One of the single most transformative sentences I’ve ever had spoken over me was when my pastor said, “You are not just supposed to be God’s light, you are his light.”
And the reason that changed everything was because for the first time I realized that I was enough. It didn’t matter that I was imperfect and sinful. It didn’t matter that I wasn’t the ‘best’ Christian, or didn’t have all the answers. It didn’t matter that I’d been hypocritical, or fallen down, or wasn’t always on the right path. What mattered was that I was a child of God.
I wasn’t just supposed to feel unworthy of His light; I already embodied it in being his daughter.
I think I’ve grown up believing that I had to work to be ‘good enough’ to spread God’s truth. From a young age, I always felt inadequate in sharing the gospel or the Bible (not to mention incredibly awkward…because how on earth do you bring that up with your friends in a normal conversation when you’re all twelve and thirteen years old?!).
I was encouraged to be God’s light and to spread His love, but I forever felt like I was doing something wrong because I couldn’t really talk about Him with my friends, and I didn’t really feel educated or strong enough in the Word to really share it with anyone else. So I didn’t for the longest time.
And even until recent years, I never really talked about my faith. The people around me and close to me knew I was a Christian. They saw me going to church. They heard me reference my faith, or do things related to it. But unless I was around other Christians or people of the same belief system, I pretty much kept quiet.
I didn’t feel ready, nor confident enough to really share the light I knew to be true. Until, one day, I finally did. And it changed my life. What I learned in finally getting the guts to speak about faith was that it didn’t matter how ‘inadequate’ or ‘unprepared’ I felt. What mattered was that I did.
And what I would realize later is that all that really matters is living boldly in Christ, not being perfect. Because I am—we all are—already His spirit and light.
I grew up thinking that I would never reach the fullness of God’s love because I was forever sinful. And I’m sure many of you have felt that way, too. Like the church is going to burn down if you step foot in it, or that you’ve just made too many mistakes to ever be forgiven. Those are lies, by the way.
But we all get suckered into believing them. Even I did, as a child growing up in the church. I still didn’t think I’d ever be good enough to receive God’s love. And the ironic thing? I already had.
Jesus died for us—that already happened—so beating ourselves up for our inadequacies does nothing but pull us away from a love that’s unconditional.
No, we’re not going to be perfect, or ‘god-like’ all the time. But as people of faith what matters is not our works but our hearts. How we choose to love and live like Jesus. How we accept that we are His light, and then shine through ourselves to others. How we brighten the entire world.
So if you’re feeling down right now, telling yourself lies, getting caught up in all the ways you’re unworthy, remember this: God doesn’t see you as any less than His creation, and loves you so much, He sent His son to die for you. If that isn’t worthiness, I don’t know what else is.