You Don’t Have It All Together (And That’s Okay)

For the longest time I thought I was falling behind because I didn’t have everything figured out. I felt like I was lacking, like there was some part of my ‘togetherness’ gene missing. I measured myself to successful people—to business owners and multimillionaires, to celebrities and leads in their industries—and wondered why I wasn’t there yet.

I failed to see that my life, my growth isn’t linear, none of ours is. I forgot the fundamental truth about being human: none of us truly have it all together, and that’s okay.

Truthfully, this idea of ‘togetherness’ is silly. None of us have all the answers or all the puzzle pieces figured out. None of us have lives that sparkle (even if it appears that way on social media). And none of us are walking on this earth with perfection, though we try to (and often fail).

We each have our journey to embark on. Some of us get where we want to be quickly; some of us take a long time. There are people who start with a career in their industry right out of college, and others who bounce from job to job trying to figure out where they fit. Some people are blessed with talent, others with luck, and most people without a clue.

Some people fall in love and settle down right away; they marry their high school sweethearts and build love stories that last longer than some people’s lives. Others take a while to find their person, and when they do, it’s tumultuous and messy and beautiful.

But the truth behind each person’s story is that they’re all unique and imperfect.

Though we’re constantly inundated with images of people with their ‘perfect’ lives and happy smiles plastered on their faces, or the unrealistic beliefs of what life is ‘supposed to be’ like, we have to learn to filter through the crap to see the reality: We’re all struggling, we’re all searching, we’re all finding our way.

None of us have it all together, and that’s okay.

Some people have fallen in love and gotten their heart broken. Others have lost a loved one far too young. Maybe some of us have graduated from college with a degree they don’t ever use, while others go back to school in their adult years, just to change direction.

At times, we fall down bad roads and get lost. After a while, we find our way back again.

See, none of us have walked a straight and narrow all our lives. None of us have been the people we were expected to be, or did the ‘right thing’ every single time. Some of us did the wrong thing on purpose, just to test the outcome.

But regardless of our story, it’s beautifully written, and ours.

The truth is, you don’t have it all together—and you won’t. There will be days where you walk with confidence in the direction you’ve chosen, and nights where you lay awake staring at the ceiling, wondering what it all means. You’ll fall in love with someone who won’t stay, or maybe you’ll be the one to leave. Maybe you’ll take a job that you love and realize it’s not what you thought it would be; you’ll leave a job you hate to pursue something you never thought you would.

You’ll lose money, make money, struggle with finances and friends and faith. At the end of the day, you’ll question who you are and are meant to be. But you’ll find yourself among the rubble and mess. And maybe that person won’t be who you thought he/she would, but you’ll learn to love him/her just the same.

Because that messy, confused, struggling person is you., and you’re so damn proud.

The world has it all wrong when they say you have to know, or have to be a certain person or thing. Yes, there is beauty in making decisions, in paving your road, and in deciding, early on, the direction you want to take.

But there is just as much value in taking your time to get there. Just as much value in making mistakes along the way.

Don’t let the world convince you that you have to live this ‘ideal’ life where everything makes sense and is understood—you’ll spend forever searching for something that won’t happen. Instead, embrace your mess and live your life without careful, cautious steps. Believe in the beating of your heart, say ‘yes’ to things that resonate with you, and don’t quit—even when you fall down.

You don’t, and you won’t ever have it all together, and that’s okay. None of us will. But we still turn out alright.
 

Featured Image Credit: Lindsay McGrath